VIVA LA FLOP!

It’s been reported today that the NBA Will Impose Fines Against Players That Flop next season. Details regarding how fine-worthy flops will be determined, the price tag of the fines, or if further penalties, such as a suspension, will come to “serial floppers” like my boy Manu Ginobili, have not been determined yet.

Most NBA fans that I converse with are vehemently opposed to flopping and feel that it takes away from the quality of the game. Flopping is perceived by most American fans (the only fans I’ve had the pleasure of conversing with) as cheating. In addition to this, most believe flopping is a bitch move. Conversely, I believe flopping is a great skill, and view it as an important implement in a NBA player’s toolkit. Many argue that a referee’s job is difficult enough without having players acting out fouls that don’t exist, but I think that the heavy roll the referee’s perception plays adds a special flavor to the NBA game. Flopping just brings this reliance on the referees perception to the forefront, which I have no problem with. NBA basketball is an imperfect game, but I’m comfortable with the lack of complete fairness and subjectivity in NBA basketball.

As I previously mentioned, a lot of folks think flopping is for pussies. Floppers are generally portrayed as frou frou Euros (read: un-American FAGGOTS, probably even vegans). This is why Manu Ginobili and Anderson Varejao are generally viewed as the NBA’s flopping spokes-models. This portrayal of floppers as faggot Euro pussies also stems from an inherent hatred and feminization of soccer on the part of Americans. Flopping is after all a crucial and prominent act in Soccer. I would even go as far to say that there is a little bit of latent homophobia in the hatred of flopping, but I really don’t want to get into gender and queer theory right now.

Regardless if you view flopping as a bitch move and cheating or an acceptable manipulation of imperfect rules, the NBA’s decision to attempt to fine floppers will probably make little or no impact. Much like the decision to call a foul or not, calling a flop is quite subjective, therefore I believe very few people will even get fined for flopping, and even if they do, NBA players stack enough to paper that a small fine is of little consequence to them. Flopping is here to stay just like the hack-a-Shaq, and any other unconventional attempt to gain a competitive advantage through the manipulation of imperfect NBA rules. The debate whether or not the flop is unlawful, “faggotry”, or smart play, is irrelevant.